we will not be silenced – Candice Louisa Daquin

tu dois me croire. (you need to believe me)

the teacher looks down at my 8-year-old handwriting

i never could spell well in French it’s true

she squints at the words, describing abuse

like they are hard to understand

then carefully, with her lips pursed, fingers suspended

in air briefly like just before you begin to play at the piano

she tapes the two pages of my poem about being molested

by my grandfather, closed and puts my book in the pile

to give back at the end of the day.

alfatayat alsaghirat yakdhibuna.!! (little girls lie)

my grandfather’s Arabic smelt like cigar and pachouli

ילדות קטנות לא משקרות !! (little girls do not lie)

My grandmother’s Hebrew smelt like empty drawers and lost things

the ash of my heart is still in those taped pages

black and rotten and voiceless it sits, waiting to be unpeeled

and let loose into this world of suppression

not much has changed since then, we are still being

obliterated, silenced, ruined by the disbelief of those

purporting to care for us, pretending to listen, therapists

friends, family, teachers, employers, each one a sharp

quill in our throat as we, collectively, too many of us

bodies upon bodies upon bodies, try in multiple languages

from every continent, in every color, every gender, every kind

of wound, to find a way

to not be silenced by your inability

to hear the truth.

Photo by Kristina Flour on Unsplash

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Born in Europe, Candice Louisa Daquin is of Sephardi French/ Egyptian descent. Daquin was the Publishing Director at the U.S. Embassy (London) before becoming a Psychotherapist. Daquin is Senior Editor at Indie Blu(e) Publishing, a feminist micro-press and Editorial Partner with Raw Earth Ink. She’s also Writer-in-Residence for Borderless Journal, Editor of Poetry & Art for The Pine Cone Review and Poetry Editor for Parcham Literary Magazine. Daquin’s own poetic work takes its form from the confessional women poets of the 20th century as well as queer authors writing from the 1950’s onward. Her career(s) teaching critical thinking and practicing as a psychotherapist have heavily influenced her writing. As a queer woman of mixed ethnicity and passionate feminist beliefs concerning equality, Daquin’s poetry is her body of evidence.

Read more at The Feathered Sleep.